And what if New York City makes you realize that everyone has something to lose too?
I enter the subway. There is a man lying on the floor. By his attire I assume he is homeless. His dirty pants dropped below his butt, his shoes are missing one sole, his jacket, well, everything about him looked homeless. Subway arrives at the next stop, 42nd Street Times Square. Some people go off. The man stands up and changes his place from the floor to the sit. Now there is more space there, so he can stretch out. He lies down, on his belly. We pass the next stop, and another one. We arrive to 14th Street and the 8th Avenue, the man looks up like this is his stop. He stands up and rushes out. Before he leaves the train, he looks behind if he didn’t leave anything behind.
Alright, this man actually has a place to be. I assumed he is sleeping in the subway, as it is warm there and he can lie down. But he was actually commuting. He had a place to be, perhaps a meeting to attend. He was traveling vertically, but still, going from one place to another. But wait. This is not even half as interesting as the fact that this homeless man looked behind if he didn’t leave anything behind! I mean, I do this all the time. I stand up and on my way to the door I look back if I didn’t drop my phone, my wallet, my earphones, my book, my shopping bag. But what the man with only one sole on the bottom of the pair of his shoes is looking for to potentially leave behind? The last button from his jacket? A bread crumble from his pocket, a cigarette bud? This man owns nothing, at least has nothing he might own on himself, and judging by his look he is at peace with not owning anything, home included. But still. He took the last look. He cares for something. Could that be his last possession? A number to a friend? A quarter? A joint? A bate of a bagel? He cared about not losing it.
Why does this surprise me? Everyone cares about something. Even my dog cares about a small leaf she finds on the street.
The train moves on. The next station is mine. I carefully look if everything is in my bag. My phone, my wallet, my book, my earphones, my lip gloss, my hand cream, my house key, my rings on my ears and fingers, my soles on my shoes, my pants on my butt…
The moment life gives you a chance to let something go, it tempts you to get attached to something new. The cycle of losing and keeping, letting go and attaching is an inevitable circle of life on this planet.
Nice to meet me today realizing that everyone has something to lose. And the more you have, the more you have to lose. And even if you have nothing, most likely you still don’t want to lose the last little thing you have, a small leaf perhaps.
